Tag Archives: manhood

When Trusting God Is All You Can Do…

Having to wait on God is the truest test of a person’s belief in Him.  Especially when nothing looks like it’s going to work out, and people seem like they are at the point of not having faith in you anymore. Particularly for men, it’s arguably the ultimate test of faith.

When his wife/fiance/girlfriend acts like she questions his resolve, or doubts him, it can be a very bad time for the man.  He’s leaning on God, and everyone else is leaning on him, and the pressure that’s on his back is making his legs weak.  He’s constantly telling himself all the promises that God put forth in His word.  “Seek Him with your whole heart”, “trust Him”, etc.  And yet, it doesn’t feel like it’s enough.  What can he do?  He’s caught between a rock and a hard place, getting crushed from both sides.

But then, he sees a minute flicker of light.  Enough for him to see an outline of something not too too far off.  God lets him see just enough to keep going.  Jesus gives him peace about his direction.  The Holy Spirit gives him confirmation that his pursuit is not in vain.  With just that little bit of hope, this man, while still feeling the weight on his back, gets the energy to move again.  He doesn’t share everything with his woman, but enough to hopefully assuage some of her trepidation.  But it doesn’t.  And just like that, some of the energy he received is gone…again.

The energy doesn’t leave because it was expended foolishly.  No.  It left because when this man shares with his woman what’s been revealed to him, her response isn’t what’s expected.  In that moment, he knows without a doubt that she has lost faith in him, and possibly some respect as well.  At this stage in life, *this* is his rock bottom.

The same platitudes and promises of God he reminded himself before, now he doesn’t want to hear. “Patience is a virtue”, “God only puts on us what we can handle”, “Stay strong; He’ll make a way out of no way”, etc. All true statements, but all he really wants to know is when will *his* situation change?

He’s weary of the seemingly constant setbacks. He shoulders the load of uncertainty because “that’s what men do”, even though it’s eating at his very being. The good face he’s put on in the past for his woman has slowly eroded. In it’s place is a mask that shows defeat, and it’s no doubt that she can read the look.

Through all of it, all he wants is for God to show him…something; anything that will let him know that he hasn’t been forsaken. As much as he wants to shake his fist at the sky, and rail against the heavens, he knows it won’t accomplish anything. Sure, the heavenly hosts will see him, but will his prayers be answered? Will the Holy Spirit speak to him; place something on his heart that will pull him up from the bottom where he finds himself?

Only God knows.

However, he can’t allow himself to wallow in the “woe is me’s”, because outside of God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, who’s going to care? His wife? It’d be nice, but she’s iffy. His kids? He’s supposed to help them if they ever feel hopeless; not the other way around. His mother? Nope, he’s a grown man.

All he has left to do is what he started out doing. Trusting and waiting on God to move.


Have you ever found yourself in a place in life where you don’t know what to do? What gets you through the rough times?


Posted by on 06/11/2013 in Life


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A Man’s Home Is Where His Peace Is

A few weeks ago I read a blog by Rae about the sometimes unpredictable nature of love.  One statement she made stood out to me more than all the others. That line was:

“…home is often a person, not a place.”

Can you say mind *BLOWN*!

I had to let it marinate for a few days before I could really tackle writing about it. It’s a simple statement, but not much in life is truer.  And yet, I feel like the ultimate feeling of “home” is when the right person, and right place, are present.

It’s especially tough for men who don’t necessarily feel like they are home, or have a home.  The restlessness that we tend to feel is not always a yearning to run wild and free, as some people would like to think.  What it really is, is that our soul isn’t at rest where we have been relegated to calling home, or have decided to call home.  The comfort and security that we need isn’t there.  Granted, it’s (usually) in a man’s power to decide where to plant himself.  However, once he’s planted, it will take him a while to truly know if he is in fact, home.

And if he’s not, it will show. He may do just enough in his relationship to keep it solvent, but no more. His emotional, mental, and physical availability will be minute. All because he’s not in a “good spot”.

There’s no feeling of peace within him. Home is supposed to be a refuge; a place of rest. He can’t get that because either the person he shares his life with doesn’t provide it, or the place is not hospitable. The worst part about it is that if he hasn’t done any self-analysis, he won’t be able to pinpoint the cause of his unrest. And if he can’t get to the source of it, peace will forever be elusive for him.

Oh, but when he does.

When he does, people will know just how dangerous such a man is. Not in a “people need to find safety” way, but in a “he’s determined” way. He won’t let anything or anyone interfere with the rest he’s found. He’ll look for ways to increase it, protect it, and cherish it. By extension, the person and place that provide it will get the same treatment.

And the man? He’ll be grateful for the peace that’s in his life.


Fellas, is “home” peaceful for you? If not, why? If so, how’d you get it?

Ladies, is this applicable to you? If not, why?

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Posted by on 03/28/2013 in Life, Random, Uncategorized


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